Thanks to the powers vested in me by the Internet I will be officiating my first wedding this weekend out in Yosemite.

I’m honored and excited to be part of the ceremony, and I’d like to share a few words of advice to the newlyweds. That said, I am incredibly unqualified to offer marriage advice of my own, and so I thought I would turn to the collective wisdom of the Internet for help.

To perhaps make it easier, if you have any words of wisdom that would fit in the form of a tweet (140 characters), tweet it to me @garychou or leave it in the comments below.

I’ll be sure to properly attribute these in the ceremony and provide a summary as well.

My simplest form of marriage advice is to keep dating.

A slightly more specific tip that Kellianne and I learned this from a couple friends: hold quarterly reviews. They're a scheduled and recurring time where larger discussions, complaints, and such can be aired without needing to be built up or provoked. Best over dinner and drinks.

I'll pass along some marriage advice that was given to my wife by a family friend many years ago: never go to bed angry. Whatever challenges you're dealing with during a given day, square it by the time you go to bed, and don't let things fester. We've followed this advice religiously for years, and I really believe in it.

And, congrats Gary! That is a big honor.

Practical marriage advice is great, but I don't think it's particularly suited for the *actual* wedding ceremony. I've used this wedding blessing to close the few weddings I have officiated:

Native American (Apache)
Here is the blessing the Apaches {presumably} used in wedding ceremonies:

"Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be shelter for the other. Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth to the other. Now there will be no loneliness, for each of you will be companion to the other. Now you are two persons, but there is only one life before you. May beauty surround you both in the journey ahead and through all the years. May happiness be your companion and your days together be good and long upon the earth."

What has worked best for me is to picture marriage like a level and to do your best to keep the bubble in the middle. Somedays it will lean toward you and you have to do the bulk of work/understanding, etc. Other days it will tip toward your partner and they will have to right the ship (and you be comfortable leaning on them). The "perfectly level" spot constantly shifts back and forth (we are human after all) though striving for that center/balanced feeling as a couple is great, wonderful and rewarding.

That's nice.

Along those same lines (and in the spirit of Hong's comment), the idea that you're "a team", and then thinking of the other person's needs as if they were your own, is a huge, important, and difficult to master mind shift.

Cherish each day like it is your first and your last together. This will help you keep your love and relationship a top priority when tough times come (and they do come!)

Recognize your own human weaknesses, and your partner's. You'll say things you don't mean, you'll snap at each other and hurt each other intentionally during fights, and you'll try to win arguments rather than resolve issues.

Acknowledge that these are *mistakes*, and when the emotions die down, you can move past them. The worst thing that happens in my (wonderful, loving!) marriage is when we both get caught up in the game of winning the argument rather than solving the problem, and we hurt each other.

Relationship is about mutual respect / expect attitude. If you don't expect anything from your partner then you will not be able to respect him/her on long term. This is mostly the case when young relationships are based on pure emotions and have no clear idea what they can expect from each other in future, when it comes to jobs, business, abilities, kids, education and many other things.

Can this person help you to reach your goals? Can you help your partner to reach her/his goals? What are your goals?

These questions should be answered before you step in to marriage, or at least generally clarified. Most of the marriages break because they didn't clarify these kind of questions and within 5-10 years they face with loads of problems.

love is allowing each other the freedom to be who you are, to be the people you fell in love with and those you will love forever. You have to grow that love, protect it, nurture it and accept that it will not always be a sunny day but you can ride the storms if you take things easy don't react yourself, think about each other and be grateful for the chance to develop within the relationship.

I love the idea of "fall forward."

You're going to get angry at each other. You're going to be frustrated. And when you are, give some grace to the other person that allows you both to grow together - not grow apart.

Choose your love; love your choice. And when you are married, be fiercely loyal, one to another.